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A guide to intentionally building intimacy with God
through the process of prayer



As our relationship with God develops, and its intimacy deepens, it becomes easier to move into more advanced prayer. I will say that the sooner this happens, the better, because stronger faith itself is an outcome.  And this relates directly to other areas of prayer life and its success (as I mentioned in the previous article, Prayers of Request). Indeed, this prayer driven growth in faith also positively impacts our complete faith journey. For a quick overview of the many other faith and belief building options, that are actually available to us, please see the article, How to believe in God.

The power of prayer is definitely all the more obvious in the lives of those who are willing to spend more time in the presence of God. Do not forget that Bible or attending church either! Reading the Gospels in particular will lead to a much better understanding of how gracious and loving our God really is. Not the least being how he became human, to serve us rather than be revered, then finally to die for us on the cross ... all out of love! Again I write that secular historical records indicate that Jesus lived and died as the Bible explains.

When you think the time is right, find out how to commit to Jesus as your Lord and Saviour. If you are a beginner Christian, then it might take time to feel comfortable coming to that position. Dont worry, if so, because we have a loving God who will always listen to us as we grow in faith and commitment. But when it comes time, and you know God is nudging you to grow closer, do it and you will benefit in many ways I can assure you. Fundamentally, it is about contentedness with life itself and real personal freedom.

Now mature prayer includes both praying for the needs of others and devotional prayer.


What I am saying here is there is nothing wrong with praying to get positive outcomes for ourselves with important issues in life (as in the Prayers of Request article) but bear in mind that prayer was never intended to be totally self oriented. Essentially, Christianity is never just about me.

Praying out of concern for the plight of others, for example, ensures that one’s mind is outward looking and not overly self-indulgent. Such behaviour is certainly an expectation of Christianity. Praying for those less fortunate than ourselves is one ‘sure-fired’ way to place our own problems in perspective. There is just so much satisfaction available to us by bringing positive changes, through solid prayer sessions, to all sorts of life issues faced by others.

Remember to always let those people, who you are praying for, know what you are doing for them if at all possible. This will ensure they know, when positive change does occur as a result of your prayers, that they have been on the receiving end of the Lord's loving care. In turn this will encourage them to grow in faith.


Also, and very importantly, God wants us to spend time with him. And it is right to just give time to the Lord in prayer, because no relationship should ever be based solely on receiving; expecting all favours to come our way. Although he regularly demonstrates his love for us through his gifts in our lives, God definitely desires a two-way relationship with each of us.

That said, the idea of devotion, adoration or worship for anything outside ourselves really is a bit foreign to many of us these days. If we believe the hype we are offered, we are a special and lucky species; potentially in control of our own boundless destinies. And sure there can be periods of success, fulfilment and happiness in our lives without God. But ah, life has a habit of eventually biting us on the bottom; proving to us in no uncertain terms just how vulnerable we are to misfortune, pain and suffering! I remind you that it is indeed a great idea to pay homage to our God, the best one to provide support as we pass through the potential minefield that awaits us in life.

Unfortunately, we must also remember that we humans on the whole are often just too interested in matters that the Bible refers to as worldliness. And although not necessarily evil, an over interest in worldly matters can eliminate the chance to focus on spirituality. Attending to the buzz of modern life can soak up our lives completely. Modern communication methods such as texting and emailing can be bad enough, but what about the time drain of ever developing forms of social media such as Facebook and Twitter adding to the dilemma? Again, there is nothing wrong with these options of digital contact with friends, family and society, but there has to be a balance in life and faith.

Yes, mature prayer does require self discipline, but the rewards are waiting. Dedicated Christians always have, and still do, regularly put time aside to just spend with God. Substantial two-way conversations with God on our life issues can occur during these deep sessions. The article following this one discusses Listening to God”.

A better way to look at prayers of devotion/ adoration/ worship is to recognise that they provide us with a genuine sense of our real, not imagined,‘specialness’ in being able to have a one-on-one relationship with the ‘Being’ (the great “I AM) who enables the universe’s every moment of existence.


Emotions play a big part in these mature prayers, just as our love towards our parents is, or should be, involved in our communication with them.

I personally find that just enjoying God’s company for a while, during most days, inevitably provides personal revitalisation and a real sense of peace in my life. I just open myself to his presence, as such, acknowledging him there. As a beginner, you do this through faith, assuming him to be there. With time, particularly as events in life gradually prove his presence there, he just becomes more and more real to you.

And I do literally feel the love during those sessions ... another incentive for mature prayer! Yes, it normally takes time to get to that stage in the relationship, but it also relies on our level of commitment and trust in him, which I will get to shortly. We cannot just conjure up the emotion of love obviously, to use in our relationship with him. So we need to work on it.

The Bible, particularly the New Testament Gospels, help by giving us insight into Gods nature: his love of and for us. We should also look, as practising Christians, at what he has been doing in our lives. We have only to engage with him in life to initiateopportunities for him to apply his loving care directly to us. No, he won t force his way into our lives. We have to open ourselves to him; his love. We were born to do so! Earlier articles in this section of the website (God in our lives) offer guidance there. So, between the Bible and our life experiences, of receiving his loving care, we can come to feel deeper emotions about him. It thereby gets easier and easier to love him. And we apply that growing sense of love towards him when spending time in mature prayer, and during the complete day for that matter.

As I have indicated already, praying regularly like this does not necessarily come easy to most of us. It does take discipline, time set aside etc, and we do have to continually work at it. Prayer life is no different to anything else we would like to succeed at. It is just that not much else can lead to improved contentment with, and direction in, life like a closer relationship with God.

Remember, asking God for help in developing these habits of prayer will prove very useful.

Also, have a look at the “Trusting God day to day and Trusting God with your life articles later in this section of the website. Those articles explain how to gradually deepen our sense of trust in the Lord. Firstly, this can make his presence become virtually concrete within our everyday lives and of course within prayer. Secondly, Gods obvious caring presence, that is illuminated via our deep ongoing trust in him, really proves his love for us.

So, mature prayer works hand in glove with that kind of deep trust in God. And wow ... I certainly know how that would all look to an atheist. Just as I was wrong when I was one, so they are now. Forgive me for having repeatedly pointed out my old mistaken views throughout this website.

And of course, time spent in a fellowship of faith; within a church, will lead to all kinds of evidence of Gods presence there. The Charismatic movement, throughout the greater Christian Church, can for example offer powerful, what I would even title tangible, evidence of his presence there. Any church though, should give us the means to note his subtle presence as a minimum, and the means to learn more about his grace. We should feel his love there too.

Continue to the next article, Listening to God.